


Voices Are Stupid

by Subtlety Lost (fishstic)



Series: The World As I See It, Is A Beautiful Place [2]
Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/F, autistic inqusitor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-13
Updated: 2017-01-13
Packaged: 2018-09-17 06:19:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9309227
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fishstic/pseuds/Subtlety%20Lost
Summary: "Sometimes words fail and voices take a break."Sage is overwhelmed. Cole helps. Sera makes it better.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This has been sitting in a folder for a few months, today I needed a break from a hurt/comfort commission I've been working on that will be the next fic I post to my main pseud (though I'm not entirely sure when it. Should be before Valentine's Day, because I have a plan for the day after, which is my anniversary), so I took a look at it, edited it slightly and decided it's worthy of being posted. Something not entirely sad for you. Enjoy. And please, if you really like it, leave a comment. I love getting comments.

Sage shook her head slightly. Even if she was Inquisitor now, she couldn’t imagine anyone listening to her if she tried to talk them about anything. Especially about this, this thing she didn’t even understand. She never understood. _Why would anyone listen? Why would they care?_ None of it made any sense, or mattered in any way. It didn’t make sense. It was bad to think about and even worse to deal with. Everything was too much, too loud.

Instead of leaving—instead of just walking away, like a normal person, like someone who knew how to solve their own problems—she sank to the floor, curling into herself with her head against her knees and her hands pressed against her ears trying to block out all the sounds except her own breathing. In, out. She shook her head slightly. It was too loud. She was getting a headache from it. And annoyed too. _Why did it have to be so loud, why was it louder than usual. Were there more people?_ That was always possible, or it could just be a bad day. That was also possible.

She could hear everything, every breath, every creak that every chair and table made, every word of every person down on the lower floors. The chink of spoons and forks against bowls and plates, the slosh of ale in glasses. Someone coughed. Maryden was singing again. She pressed her head against her knees harder and her hands against her ears more forcefully.

A hand touched her back briefly—it left when she tensed, but it’s owner remained. There was movement, then Cole crouched in front of her holding out his hand for her. She looked up briefly to see what he wanted. In his hand was a pair of earplugs not unlike the kind Dagna used when she thought her work was going to explode. She took them carefully and stuck them in her ears, curious what they might do. Cole obviously thought they would help. Her brain practically sighed in relief when the noise was mostly replaced by a much softer muffled sound of blood rushing in her ears.

She sighed happily and smiled at Cole. She wanted to thank him. Wanted to. Really, she did, but… She looked down slightly when the words wouldn’t come. It was probably stupid. _Why won’t the words just work?_

Cole smiled back. “It’s hard when everything is loud.” Whether he actually said that aloud or just mouthed it she was unsure. “Do they help?”

She nodded slightly. The words were stupid, hiding or something. She hated when they did that. It happened a lot though, her words were shy and usually forced to come out of hiding. _Stay calm_ , she told herself, _even though you can’t talk, Cole probably won’t be mad. He’s nice._

“Would you like some food?” he asked.

She shook her head. Keeping her breathing steady was hard enough right now. It was just about the only useful thing she could do at the moment. If she let her breathing lose control she’d start to panic and she wouldn’t be able to control her magic then. There was nothing else she wanted to do at that point. She didn’t even remember why she’d come up there in the first place. There must have been a reason, but it was gone, just like her words.

“Would you like a nug?” he asked.

She shook her head. They were answers without words, she understood that. Signs that everyone seemed to know. _Where would he get a nug?_ She had no doubts that he could get one if she said she wanted it, but then she’d have to take care of it and she wasn’t sure she knew how.

“Do you want a dog?”

Sage tilted her head. Her Mabari, Basil, was recovering from injuries right now and she wasn’t allowed to mess with him. Surely he wouldn’t mess with Basil like that. But… there was another Mabari. The commander, that strange Dalish elf that spent as much time with the spymaster as she spent with the troops, she had a Mabari. No way that Cole meant _that_ Mabari. She shook her head despite wanting a dog. Meiriana wouldn’t be happy if she caught them messing with her dog. Probably.

He rocked back on his feet for a moment then smiled. “Would you like Sera?”

She bit her lip. Maker, she did want Sera, but would Sera want her when she couldn’t even force herself to talk? The thought frightened her. Her sister had never wanted her when she couldn’t talk. Why should she believe that anyone else would? Cole was different. He wasn’t a person, not exactly. She took a deep breath. _Sera isn’t Rose._ The thought gave her pause. _Sera is nothing like Rose._ Maybe Sera would want her ater all. Even if she couldn’t talk.

Cole tilted his head slightly.

Sera would be nice, but what if Sera didn’t want her? What then? It would only make her feel worse. After a moment, she nodded very slightly then pressed her head against her knees again, afraid. The thoughts were the loudest thing, and constant. _Sera isn’t Rose. Sera isn’t Rose. Sera isn’t Rose. Isn’t Rose. Isn’t Rose. Isn’t Rose. Rose. Rose. Rose._ She shook her head trying to get the thoughts out.

At a point, she couldn’t tell how long it had been or honestly when Cole had even left, but at a point Sera sat down in front of her with a stack of paper and some pencils. Sage looked up when she noticed the movement. Her eyes flickered with some unknown emotion as she watched Sera pick up a pencil and write on one of the sheets of paper. After a moment that felt like eternity, Sera held up the paper for her to read.

‘Sometimes words are stupid and voice take a break. Sometimes some things are just too much. Smells for me, usually. Sounds sometimes. Sounds for you, yeah? It’s right shitty, ain’t it, Buckles? But you don’t have to be alone, unless you want to be. I’m here. Creepy’s here too, I guess. If you want him to be.’

Sage took a deep breath and nodded. She reached out for a pencil and paper of her own, pleasantly surprised that Sera had so much of the paper that she liked. ‘Please don’t leave,’ she wrote on the paper, ‘You’re my best friend.’

Sera nodded fiercely and put her paper down to write on it. ‘I wouldn’t leave, Buckles. You’re my best friend, too.’

Sage smiled slightly, the best she could manage. Her lip was trembling though, she knew she might cry at that. She didn’t know how to reply. Nothing mattered more to her than the fact that Sera was going to stay.


End file.
